by Nancy Wesson
Reprinted from The Austin Homesteader, 2002
What do farm animals (sheep in particular) and Lavender Eye Pillows have in common? OK – they’re both fluffy. No that’s not it…… Sleep! They are both mentioned as possible remedies for insomnia. Counting sheep has never worked for me – before I get too far into it, we’re off to somewhere else on the farm. Besides, after chasing a few to get them back behind the fence at my sister’s farm in West Virginia and hearing all of the baa’ing in unison – one basso profundo, several tenors, and a tiny soprano, there’s nothing remotely restful about sheep. Kava Kava, Chamomile tea, or Valerian Root can sometimes take the edge off a restless night. And I do love those little Eye Pillows filled with lavender – they smell good and keep my eye lids weighted down, but most of the above options haven’t provided much relief .
You Don’t Have to Count Sheep
There are tomes written about sleep disorders and I don’t plan to add to that. However, there are some really effective remedies that have to do with the way you arrange your bedroom.
I seem to work with a lot of folks with sleep disorders-ranging from not sleeping through the night to having to read War and Peace before nodding off. Not sleeping well really does take its toll on health, relationships, creativity, productivity, and well – life in general.
A Few Tips
Here are a few tips to try before you reach for the sleeping pills. Not only will they help with your sleep, they make the bedroom feel cozy and private. . The ideas listed below have worked for many people. So read ‘em and sleep.
- Position your bed so that you can see the door without being line with it. Draw an imaginary straight line coming through the door. If it falls across your body at any point, your sleep is probably being impacted by placement. WHY? In practical terms, there is a lack of privacy. In terms of your subconscious, you don’t have enough warning before someone “walks in on you.” This is true even if you feel very safe and secure in your home. The psyche is always scanning when you sleep this way, and this exposed position interferes with restful sleep.
Seriously – Get a Headboard
- If you don’t already have one, you deserve it. And you’re probably not in college anymore, so you don’t have to move it every semester. Solid is best because it gives the feeling of greater support and protection. Sleeping in a bed without a headboard is a little like sitting with your back to the door. Again, it feels less secure and more temporary. A headboard gives you both real and symbolic support, and can make for more restful sleep. (Note the photo to the left: both sides of the bed have a table and lamp adding an extra sense of balance.)
- The bathroom! Can you see the bathroom from where you sleep? Seems like a good idea when you’re fumbling your way through the dark to have that sucker just as close to your bed as possible doesn’t it? Wrong…. Here’s the deal. If you’re sleeping next to the bathroom door, once again your subconscious is ALWAYS AWARE and you’re likely to be getting up more times in the night to use the facilities than is physiologically necessary. Sure you wake up and “go,” because the toilet is calling to you “ I’m heeeeerrr.” Moving the bed is sometimes all that’s necessary to deal with this problem. Closing the door is less effective, but might offer some help.
And those mirrors!
- Do you sleep in the “Hall of Mirrors?” Oops – right next to a solid wall of mirrored sliding doors? Or – you have a beautiful dressing alcove lined with mirrors and you can see it from your bed. Mirrors in a bedroom interfere with sleep and you can pick and choose from a list of reasons, some of which might sound like hocus-pocus, but work nevertheless. Several of my clients with long histories of sleep problems have beds in just such positions. With no other placement options available, I suggested hanging drapes (sheer or heavy) on a tension rod, to close over the alcove (or sliding door mirrors) at night They all have reported improved sleep.
If you can move the mirrors or the bed, do it. If not, sheers or posters on the mirrored doors (especially in a kids room) really make a difference. Draping a free standing mirror with a scarf also works.
The room to the left has both culprits: a mirror and a TV (coming up next on the sleep-offender list). When the TV is off, it acts as an addtional reflective surface.
Don’t Hate ME… but:
- No TV!! ( NOW SHE’S GONE TOO FAR!!) There’s many a husband (or wife) out there that given the choice between a TV or spouse in the bedroom would say “I’m really gonna miss that woman (man)!” Besides TVs emitting EMF long after they are turned off, there are myriad reasons to get the one-eyed monster out of the bedroom. First, whatever you’re watching just before sleep, stays with you. The news, latest victim movie, or WWL wrestling match are not great bedtime stories. Then, there is the fact that the TV, once off acts like a mirror. And if you need another reason, having the TV blaring is not really conducive to other more relaxing pastimes – like reading, talking or romance. So, if you’re not going to take the TV OUT, at least close it behind cabinet doors, or put a cover over it before nodding off.
- Remove the desk/computer. When you have a work station in your bedroom, your mind is never completely at rest. Somewhere in you night- brain there is a guilt laden workaholic reminding you that you have bills to pay, letters to write, tests to study for. You can get rid of that middle-of-the-night chatter (or at least muffle it) if you get your work out of the bedroom. The same is true of bringing work to bed with you. It’s not good for sleep or romance – and rumor has it that those are the ONLY two things that should go on in the bedroom.
More…
- If I haven’t completely alienated you with the last suggestion, there are some more good tips that help create a cozier bedroom.
If I haven’t completely alienated you with the last suggestion, there are some more good tips that help create a cozier bedroom.
Bring in a comfy chair or two for private conversations, reading or meditating. Add a little side table, an afghan and a good reading lamp and it feels like you’ve gone to a bed and breakfast for the weekend. Also good to encourage couple time, away from curious little people, or noisier teenage people.
Give both sides of the bed a bed side table and lamp. They should be balance in composition, but not necessarily identical. This symbolically recognizes both partners in a relationship as equally important. Think about what it says when only one of you merits a lamp, place to put your nighttime things, etc.
Add a soft, luxurious rug to put your feet on when you get up in the morning and bring in some fresh flowers. Now, take a nice warm bath, put on some soft relaxing music and go to sleep.