So after a healthy round of Mosquito Zapping, I settled into an uncharacteristically quiet night with my book, Pillars of the Earth. (Anyone wanting to know how to build a cathedral, this tome is the ticket…).  I think Sunday nights might actually be quieter, because the entire day has been spent with church music and the singing and dancing that accompany that. It sounds exhausting.  Also, there was no electricity and this acts as a dampener some of the time.  (Sorry Holly and Bill. I know your 30 hour Country Western Marathon in the field behind your house was done with the aid of a generator…) – Therefore, there was no white noise of the fan or thudding bass, to mask the blood curdling, soul wrenching guttural screams that pierced the night silence around 10 PM.  It went on – and on – and it was the kind of scream that – in the States – would result in an immediate call to 911.  However, here there is no such thing, although there is a 999 which sometimes, randomly results in action, if anyone is answering the phone, if you can provide an address or if it is taken seriously.  After all, it could just be “wife beating,”  an offense that while formally discouraged by the powers that be, is still largely a culturally accepted event.

What to do?  We have had discussions about this during Peace Corps training. Does one intervene and if so – how, when and to what degree?  My memory of EMS and Victim Services training was triggered along with  the admonition to “first considered your own safety.”  With domestic violence here, there is usually liquor, sometimes a knife or weapon and chances are – bloodletting, which also means a high probability of the presence of exposing self to HIV/AIDS.  According to Jaron, whose room backs to the tenant’s quarters, their conversation simply continued with no apparent concern. They are apparently not concerned, or a least not moved to action.

The screaming went on and there were no other voices, no talking, yelling, running feet, furniture crashing etc.    It trailed off into the town and was replaced by some male voices in the distance, then came back to the neighborhood in slightly less violent tones and settled into sobs and retching. My stomach was tightening, heart racing – feeling threat, though it was not rational personal threat.

The next day, I ran into the middle-aged Ugandan nurse who lives in the compound-quarters behind my house and asked her about it.  She gave me a slightly deprecating smile  that implied it was nothing….  then said, “it is nothing to disturb you!”   Hmmm – that’s not doing it for me, because one thing  is certain, I was certainly disturbed.  So I prevailed, and was told “she was probably being beaten by her husband.  But it is not for you – it is for them.”  Well that’s certainly reassuring.

So then, I asked my visiting house guest, who lives on the compound grounds of a residential secondary-school for girls and she informed me that such screaming is not un-common and is not always proportionate to the event.  Well now I feel better….  (this is certainly not helping).  She explained that they often get that level of  drama from self-imposed exorcisms and teacher inflicted caning – as in corporal punishment.   Still not helping.

So, I am left looking at everyone I pass on that street now to see if there is any evidence of what went on in the middle of an otherwise quiet night in this small town in the middle of Africa, knowing that this and similar scenes are probably played out time and time again in other little villages where no one really intervenes or talks about it later.

This is Africa.

The post Screams in the Night appeared first on Nancy Wesson Consulting.

Reprinted from The Austin Homesteader, 2003

I wish I may, I wish I might – have the wish I wish tonight…..

Interesting, don’t you think, that old expression “Be careful what you wish for, you might just get it.” On one hand we are taught as children that wishing is a fantasy. Fairy Tales tell us that “wishes really do come true.” We are told both “You create you own reality,” and “Wishing doesn’t make it so.” So what’s true in this mix? Well, if it were one of those trick multiple choice questions our college teachers, the SAT, GRE and all the others love so much – I would have to choose “All of the above.” But with some explanation.

Passion vs. Fear

In previous articles, I’ve introduced the idea that we certainly have a hand in creating our present and future reality. Also, that positive thinking alone won’t do it – you have to passionate about the desire. Being passionate in either direction will do it – fear pulls in stuff, just as joy does. So I would modify the “Be careful what you wish for – by saying, “Be careful where you spend your emotional time, you might just pull in more of the same.”

If a person can embrace that concept, the next question is usually, “But how do you stay out of the negative and move toward something more positive. Or how do you keep your goal in mind and support it with the excitement of reaching it (rather than the fear of NOT reaching it)? There are some good tricks available from – yep – Feng Shui.

Psychological-Feedback Loop

Most people think of Feng Shui as the art of arranging furniture to be able to create an inviting space… and that’s true. BUT, and it’s a big “but,” – it’s far more than that. Feng Shui is a method of getting clear about what you want in your life, then creating an ergonomically sound environment, rich in the symbolism that keeps you constantly reminded of where you want to be and go. It supports you in your goals, by keeping them at the forefront of your physical, mental, and spiritual worlds. Carl Jung (left), the famous Swiss psychiatrist (1875-1961) called this a psychological feedback loop.

There is a sector in the Feng Shui map or Bagua that relates to the Future, although on most Baguas you will see it defined as Children or Creativity. Understanding that Children represent physical Creativity brought into the Future, helps make sense of the fact that the Future sector is also is associated with bringing projects and desires into the future.

Look Right!

The position of that sector is 45 degrees to the RIGHT of the primary point of entry into a room or a house (via the architectural front door). Put another way, if the entry is in the middle of the wall, (see Front Door Positions in the Bagua image to the right) then the Future Gua falls at the 3:00 position. We know, through the science of Merchandizing, that merchandize placed in that position in the room will sell faster and for the highest price. Pretty interesting that both a 5,000 year old esoteric philosophy and a statistically based science like merchandizing agree on that position being a very powerful one.

News You Can Use

So here’s some news you can use:

• Choose a specific “heart’s desire”
• Find a symbolic representation of that desire ( i.e. a picture, sculpture, phrase, etc)
• Place the symbol in the Future area
• While placing it, state your intention about the desire
• Be observant for subtle changes, interactions, etc that relate to the goal

Superstition: Not really

Some folks wonder if this isn’t just a little superstitious. Well, merchandizing is not based on superstition; if something sells – it sells. The action at work in Feng Shui (a science of observation) is that of looking obliquely-right when we enter a room. Check it out for your self. Every time we walk through the door, we unconsciously notice whatever is displayed on the right. We may even lose conscious awareness of it, but it imprints on the brain just the same. What we are constantly reminded of becomes part of the subconscious – reminding us of our aspirations. Conversely, if you have objects around you that have a negative connotation, you begin to think and feel negatively – placing limits on yourself.

The Power Position

Here are a couple of real life examples. You can interpret these facts however you like, but the “coincidences” are interesting. The first has to do with a client whose home I helped organize. Nearly every room needed work, both in clutter busting and arrangement.

Her husband’s office started with him working with his face to the wall and back to the door. We moved the desk to its most commanding position, known as the power position, and got it organized. In the process we found a picture of a diner in San Francisco (city changed to protect privacy). We hung it in the Future area, because that’s where it worked. There was no current plan or desire to relocate there.

(Note: Position #1 to the left is the power position. Image: from my book, Moving Your Aging Parents)

A week or so later, the husband, who had never requested a transfer and whose job was secure, got a promotion which required him to move to San Francisco. They sold their house and moved within a month.

Subliminal Reminders

Another story involves one of my sons (now 20) who received a large poster made by combining two smaller posters of his favorite things: fast cars and a dense redwood forest with a mountain stream and a bridge leading to a small cabin. This poster – with the title “The Motivation for Higher Education” looked like a clever underground garage housing five super fast sports cars – under the canopy of the redwoods. I’d hung over his desk, where he could see it from his bed and – when he entered his room. And yes – it remained there, in the Future position, for about 6 months and I replaced it with maps.

Choosing an alternative to college, we had reserved him a spot in a fantastic, month long intensive experiential home building course in Vermont or some such place. The week before he was to leave, he broke his heel bone. Not only is this bone nearly impossible to break, it’s nearly as stubborn to heal. He had to be off his feet – no crutches for this break – for 6 weeks, eliminating any possibility of his going to Vermont. He was morose. One night, he stayed up surfing the Web – not usual for him.

The Realization

The next morning he announced his new passion was racing cars. The only school with a racing program that would also teach him a “practical skill” was Jim Russell Racing School at Sears Point Race Way in Napa Valley – northern California – home of great wine and giant redwoods. It wasn’t until we were cleaning out his closet, getting him ready to leave that I re-discovered the poster in his closet. That’s when it hit me – and it still gives me a little chill when I realize the connection.

The little cabin by the stream was waiting there too and up for rent, though we decided on something less primitive. Although he was a normal teenage boy, with fantasies of having the fastest car on the planet, racing had never been in his vernacular as a career. But we won’t go there… Now he’s flying helicopters in Oregon and I WANT TO KNOW WHO GAVE HIM A PICTURE OF HELICOPTERS!!!!!

Do with this, as you will. It’s another example of how the objects in our surroundings impact us and more importantly how we can consciously use artwork and accessories to create a path for ourselves.

As always, I welcome your calls, questions or stories. Let me hear from you at [email protected]

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